life updates

the mountain is warming up from the soft dusting of snow this morning. i have been listening to lots of bluegrass music lately, intentionally filling my senses with warm, spring associations of the south. it is strange to feel so intensely, un-rhythmically torn from the seasons, or at least the seasons in arkansas that have been my entire lifetime until now. i ache for the smells of potting soil and the decadently sweet aromas of flowers specific to this season: the tulips, the easter flower's, wet grass. i am responsible for chuck getting an ear ache, because everyday i hear birds outside my window, i rush over to fling it open in hopes that there will be that southern, sun warmed breeze that has so many years of my life made me much more creative and alert and alive. and then when we are reading, or cooking, or watching the office on our computer, chuck or i will stop at the window and beckon the other one to "come see." we will watch, within minutes, a windy snow (comparable to spring rain i guess) blanket our small little mountain town. and the we laugh. i laugh especially, with a deepened sense of delight when i realize how foolish i have been lately, not living completely in the moment, in this amazing scenery. we live in a small mountain town, just those words are still pretty perspective altering. we look past our exposed closets and our unfinished trim work, we look out our window and realize that nothing in our lifetime will every be like this, feel like this again. we feel blessed we are doing it together. we literally shake our heads in disbelief constantly.

a couple of weeks ago, we attended our first condo association meeting. i was too shy to bring up in front of the new group my dreams of a roof-top community garden. i cornered one of the developers after the meeting to talk on a more comfortable one-on-one level. i was so thankful for her warmness and excited by her own plans of a three part rooftop space: solar panels, outdoor kitchen, and garden. i love that at the same time that i have been getting really into the idea of self-sufficiency (or i shouldn't really say "self" since all significantly positive changes in our lifetime will be made as a synchronized effort and not as individuals disappearing from society completely) that my friends from arkansas have apparently been thinking and planning on the same wave length. next up on chuck and my book list: "the urban homestead: your guide to self-sufficient living in the heart of the city" and "toolbox for sustainable city living: a do-it-ourselfers guide" and "fresh food for small spaces." i am learning that the old cliched sayings like "the more love(or energy, or positive thinking, or hard work) you give, the more love (results) you receive" is absolutely 100 percent true in every aspect of life, but also just the more i am willing to open up to people and share with them my ideas (what i feared would be considered too idealistic, too naive, too impractical)the more that i find that i live in a community who are all quiet activists, just disillusioned with not being able to FEEL a sense of community. and to use another overly recited quote, "we are the ones we have been waiting for," and it is time to get busy!

on the creative front, i am still in the process of getting the wholesale fabric account. i am very excited about that! and i am really into felt play food right now (for children, not me!). i am going to try making it myself, practicing first using crafting felt. i priced the 100% wool felt today--yikes! i can't afford it until i get really, really, really good! to further illustrate my point in the last paragraph about saying what i need/want for a more wholesome existence and being so surprised with a warm response, i emailed the ladies that own the building and told them of my idea for a creative space outside of my spare bedroom. i had asked for something incredibly small. they offered me an open apartment for a lower renting price, though i still couldn't afford it. i thanked them and asked for them to keep me in mind if any janitorial closets became empty soon. i rethought using my spare room and decided that it was the most feasible. and then the other day one of them told me that i should share the apartment/studio with a local artist, who i just so happened to know from work. she is this beautiful red headed woman with a plump blond breastfeed baby. i always love it when they come into the store. i remember her saying months ago, when asked if she was in a hurry, that "oh no, we've learned to not have schedules, that way we aren't ever late or disappointed with our day." and she has this incredibly laid-back, flowing personality, and this really funny, intellectual yet humble sense of humor. her child seems to glow from her attentiveness and energy. i still can't afford half of the rent, but it is great to see that the developers have such a similar vision for this place. (we kind of thought we would be the young misfits.) it is funny to think that my entire 20's i believed that i would run away with all my friends to start an artist community somewhere in the ozarks, but i am finding it here in this old brick building, in this historic and somewhat deserted mining town. again, we get as much as we give. i guess i forgot the "action" part of the process in my twenties of planning.

wow, this is incredibly long-winded. i will wrap it up by saying, i love you and enjoy every single moment of that beautiful arkansas spring. and i will be enjoying this weather, exactly as is. we live in the mountains, can you believe it?